Goodbye~ luv

edward and bella

My Dearest Edward,

I feel your sweet poison rushing through my tender, aging veins, every beat of mine heart reminds me your still there. Somehow though it seems to be fading, like an immunity has begun to flow through these same delicate veins, subsiding, overstepping, smothering “it” lil by lil cleansing away a separation of red and white cells.. Plasma’s begin to disburse your venomous serum. As I bleakly traverse the property  a succumbing sunrise entranced  me; I imagined a place where two were one, a realm of imagined time. Where souls, “ours” cut the ominous void in distance. Collapsing together upon the soft mossed forest floor, simply laying caressed in conversations, in perception of us only. No one else would understand, at that pause in time, I was suddenly  mystified by what is not, nor will ever be… I started to deliberately walk again, only to find I was home where I began.  Heart still beating, muddy soles, I open the door. Listlessly crossing the threshold,  a solitary tear finds its way to the brazen floor, these hazel eyes have shed your last tear! The door of reality, it closes, leaving you outside. Strangely I somehow feel fine or do I?

Eternal Luv,

Bella

A.T. ~I couldn’t allow what hurt me to influence my decisions anymore, It was too little too late. I had to do what was right now. Edward would never see me shed another tear

~ Eclipse~

Nite Notes 2016

Copyright 2016  by Belinda Mercado no reproduction without prior consent

To My Fellow Women, Prince Charming Isn’t Going To Save You — Thought Catalog

jeffisyGrowing up, I watched Snow White being revived just from a simple kiss. I watched Sleeping Beauty also being saved just from a prince’s kiss. And then I watched Ariel almost kill herself just to be with a man she had never met before. Those movies ultimately showed me that these women were never going to be…

via To My Fellow Women, Prince Charming Isn’t Going To Save You — Thought Catalog

Blu Shadows

blu moon

Blu Shadows

I lie awake tossing in thoughts of you

Can’t find sleep without your melody

I’m fighting a burning desire to see u tonight

I wanna feel your warmth next to me

I need u tonight

Gonna get in the red truck and drive

Won’t stop till I’m there beside you

Down to the river we’ll go

Riparian music will lead us there

 

I need u

I want u

Tonight babe just u & I makin love in the blu shadows of the moon

I need u

I want u

The tender touch of your hands comfort me

It’s in the way u hold me close to u

Swaying under the stars, just u & me

One within our universe, complete sweetness you’ll see

 

I’ll give it to u anyway u want me too

Its u~ I wanna please all of u, tonight

The smell of passion lingers everywhere

The tastes of your lips are still here with me

 

I need u

I want u

Tonight babe just u & I makin love in the blu shadows of the moon

I need u

I want u

I’m gonna get in the groove with u babe

Were gonna rock this river bank

Starting over now, making tender memories

Moments spent with u are a delicacy in me

Oooh babe I wanna go there with u tonight

 

Put your hands round mine

Look into these hazel eyes they’ll show u no lies

Gonna make u want me babe, like the miner wants for gold

Gonna go deep inside memorizing each & every fold

I need u

I want u

Tonight babe just u & I makin love in the blu shadows of the moon

I need u

I want u

I’ll give it to u any way u want me to

It’s u, I wanna please all of u tonight

The smell of passion, lingers everywhere

The tastes of your lips are still here with me

Whoaooooooo need u tonight

Gonna get in that red truck and drive

Won’t stop till I’m there beside you

Blu shadows

~*~Bam ~*~ 2014

*Nite Notes*

copyright-symbol

Copyright 2016  by Belinda Mercado no reproduction without prior consent

Obscure Risk~

20150905_182102

I harbor no fear in me ~ of you

Stepping cautiously now unto your trails

Tainted with your sweet poisonous ways

I wanna decipher these mappings of who you truly are

Given time I’ll explore all of you

I wanna see your soul complete

Integrate our beings as one

It’s the sweetest poison you are molded from

Given time I will taste it all

 

I  know you will be worth every tear I’ll eventually cry

 

It’s an obscure risk, following the trails you’ve left behind

Still I’ll move onward shuffling my aching feet

Atop the distinctive clues

You’ve carefully left them here for me

Knowing I would not hesitate to follow

In a vision, I saw you standing there

Loathing beneath the raging storm

Thunder~ we cannot escape the distance in which we hear her

As lighting fills the night sky, she dances in quick flashes

Revealing the bleakness upon your tear stained cheek

All alone you’re shivering and cold, grieving bout’ days gone by

I’m offering to clothe you now with all the colors of me

Let me be the intense fiery blanket that warms your soul

Given time I’m gonna make you whole

Rid you of all the sad times you’ve seen

I’ll give you shelter from all this past years’ blue-blue rain

I’m gonna take care of you baby, just you wait and see

Your cryptic poisonous trails led me here

Scattered beneath the mystical star filled night

I stumble across pieces of you, broken and torn

Mecum hill it’s where I saw you~ tangled in a black abyss

Amidst the moons light I stop to stare

Gonna gather up these pieces and fit you together again

I’ll be the emotional adhesive for you ~ if you let me

Gonna rid you of all the anguish inside

I’ll make you a happy man again

I promise to fill each and every need

Absolve all your sadness till your complete as one ~ with me

It’s an obscure risk, following the trails you’ve left behind ~ I know

Yet you’re worth every tear I will eventually cry!

 

~*~ BAM~*~

Nite Notes 2015

copyright-symbol

Copyright 2016  by Belinda Mercado no reproduction without prior consent

 

Facedown~

I’m left

Facedown In a memory

Can’t breathe

Can’t escape

This cesspool, reflecting at me

I’m seeking that first moment

In the alley

Hurried, chaotic, embrace

I close my eyes, pursuing him

It condemns me

A slap in the damn face

Bitter force

I’m left

Facedown in a memory

Can’t breathe

Can’t escape

You sang

I mused

Painfully slow

Lyrical blues drift

Steel strings, bent

Your voice echoes

Sets loose my soul

Gradually

Only a barstool between us

I tried to bargain Jack & coke

Inaudible voice

You did not hear

Again

I’m left

Facedown in a memory

Can’t breathe

Can’t escape

I begin to wander

There you are, leaning

Sustaining the edge of the dance floor

I danced

You watched

I felt your eyes

Strat, out of place

Your answer

Pierces me deep

Swaying, shuffling away

I dance among them

Try to disappear, but sense u near

I’m left

Facedown in a memory

Can’t breathe

Can’t escape

The sidewalk beneath us

I try again

Offering the river

You lacked a pole

Remember?

Twilight’s last call rang

Snap went the Samsung

That photo

Scar tissue begins

Eluded, feeling timeless, I

Wander right through

A stream of stale smoke

Exiting… to the weir

I’m still

Facedown in that memory

Can’t breathe

Can’t escape!!!

Bam

*Nite notes 2015 *

copyright-symbol Copyright 2016  by Belinda Mercado no reproduction without prior consent

 

A.T. “Who needs a smoke filled bar when we can dance on the lawn under the stars!”

20151021_125001

Thank You!

flock of seagullsYou have taught me to see life through a kaleidoscope of colors It’s an amazing array of views I’d have missed if we had not crossed paths months ago. This knowingly being the one chosen path in my life I will never allow myself to regret! I now know it was the right direction to follow because it led me to you my ~”Beautiful Friend” As I sit here thinking bout’ you I realize that you have made me whole again, Thank You.

I am now capable of soaring to great heights, all because of you and what you’ve shown me No longer am I afraid to spread my wings~ your gentle winds cradle me Before you I thought this to be totally unimaginable you proved me so wrong, Thank you!

You have taught me to be the best I possibly can be, regardless of the circumstances at hand I’ll never be able to repay you equally for what you’ve given me, it encompasses too much, it’s priceless!

It’s allowed me to open a place for you that has been locked away deep inside For a long time the caverns of me and who I am lye in a complete darkness

Till you with your lantern of undoubted kindness and patience. You lit the way and helped open those doors for me I now welcome you in because I know you embrace an understanding for this place and the person I’ve become

I am so grateful to have you as my “Beautiful Friend”I can’t remember a time when I was more complete than I am today. Thank You for lighting the way & Thank You for setting me free to simply be me…

 

~*~ Belinda Ann ~*~

*Nite notes 2015*

copyright-symbolCopyright 2016  by Belinda Mercado no reproduction without prior consent